TMI fertility stuff....

Well, after 3 weeks past IUI with no hint either way, I finally have my answer. You, Sweet Baby Maserati, have a timeline all your own. Today, on what would be cycle day 34, I finally started a spontaneous period, without the aid of Provera, which is waiting for pick-up at the pharmacy. I am so thankful that I do not need it, it takes at least 2 weeks off of the waiting. Now, I simply start again. On Wednesday, CD3, I will submit to a series of blood tests. Then, they will refill my Femara, we will wait for ovulation, try IUI again, and hopefully, you will be conceived. Last time, I got the positive ov kit on cycle day 12, if we stick around that timeline (and, why would we, huh baby M?), then I can hopefully expect a smile on February 8. It seems forever away, but, for you, it is worth it. 

Now, you must know how hard it is for me too keep this a secret from Grandma. But I want so badly for you to be a surprise! But I almost wonder if they know, somehow...? See, last week, Grandpa Perkins asked me, as I was picking Hudson up after work, "are you having another baby?" WHAT???! So, I try to laugh it off and ask "huh?? Why?" He explains that he wants to buy a high chair for Hudson, and is debating on a cheap one or buying a more expensive one that will last through another child. I joke, "Hm, well, do ya think I could talk to my husband about it? Or should we just toss a coin right now?" Anyways, I think I did pretty good getting out of the topic without suspicion. But then, just yesterday, we went to breakfast with Grandpa Beck and he asked "So, anything new? A pregnancy or something?" WHAT?!?! Daddy and I shake it off, "why we would we want that? Have you met Hudson?? Can you imagine two of that?!?" (Ohhh, I can!! And I do, often!!) 

All the grandparents want a baby girl to spoil. And, it would be silly for me to deny that I don't imagine that. But, in all actuality, I just want Hudson to be a brother. I want one more chance to be mommy because it is something I am good at and truly enjoy. I want you and Hudson to have a friendship like I have with Uncle AJ, something so deep and real. I want to give you all the love and experiences we've given Hudson. I want to see daddy swoon over a tiny baby once again. I want the infectuous love that comes with pregnancy and a baby. I want you, little one.  

Let's go again!!

~mommy